28 weeks

Yes we finally hit the 28 week mark, so much has happen to little Zane but he is a survivor and a fighter. I am amazed at how well my daughter has held up-- the stress is unbelievable. The stress affects everyone in the family, your daily routine is now planned around the trip to the hospital.   I always thought I was a good nurse who could empathize with the parents of my primary (the baby you take care of and follow until discharge) but now I have deeper respect for what these families have to deal with on a daily basis. 
Your life is for ever changed, when the phone rings you start to dread answering it for fear that the news will be bad., even when things are going well you hold your breathe anticipating that any minute something will happen. Your start to build you day around routines, if i call early he has a good day, or if I miss a visit he gets sick, if I wore green with yellow he needed a septic work up but when I ate a taco the day before he tolerated his feeds--- you perceive relationship to exist and hope that you figure out the right steps to take each day to ensure the safety of your baby.  I feel as if I am walking through a dense fog I can see the light at the end of the road but I am unsure of what steps I can take to quickly get me to my destiny.  I just want to walk into the unit and hear he is on full feeds and can go home, instead I know that he is not out of the "woods" yet and at 575 grams we have only started the journey towards being discharged.
I am so thankful for Zane's nurses, his primary team allows me the opportunity each day to function with some normality and to know that he is being watched by those who not only love him but are watching out for us (his family).

Ok enough rambling...